Stay Accountable


I must admit, this journey with my knee overall sucks. Like, really sucks. It challenges my identity, my independence, my relationships, and the role I play within those relationships. But, no matter how much I complain, or stamp my foot (not feet — I can only stamp the one), and no matter how depressed I feel, my situation doesn’t change. The way I experience the situation definitely changes though. A LOT. And I've had 5 years worth of experience with which to experiment with the same old struggle (or adventure, or learning experience, depending on how I'm looking at in any given moment).

I have noticed that the world and the people around me begin to reflect the attitude I carry. So basically I get to decide if I want to be in a shitty situation AND feel shitty all the time (and make the people I love feel shitty too), or I can be in a shitty situation that, like everything, is impermanent, and simultaneously I can be grateful and hopeful and joyful. 


I am not saying it’s easy, or that I’m sunshine and roses all the time. Believe me, I can become a champion whiner. When I do something, I do it 100%, you know? But, in this photo for example, at first glance it’s me getting pushed around the beach in a wheelchair, which admittedly is not my favorite way to experience a beach vacation. More importantly, though, it’s me on a sweet beach vacation with people that love me enough to happily push me around the beach in this unwieldy, bubble-tire chair. Also I got to see a gopher turtle, and learn that there is such a thing as a gopher turtle. 

So the feelings I “walk” away with are gratitude, love, and joy. And when I get a hit of that perspective, things are good, even when they’re not, and I can get on with living my purpose rather than wallowing in my own self-made misery. Hear that, self? Stay accountable.